Welcome to the first installment of the Fan-fiction Reading Club! Let me talk about how this will work and then I'll introduce the first fan-fiction. The Fan-fiction reading club is structured to improve ourselves as writers and role-players, not to belittle other people's works. Treat each fan-fiction as a learning opportunity. 

The club will meet each month to discuss a theme. The theme may be a specific character, a literary style, an area of improvement, etc. and will be determined based upon a poll. Each time the club meets, the fan-fiction will be of a different length, so as to appeal to a variety of readers with differing time commitments. In the case of novel-length fan-fiction, we may only read a select number of chapters. 

Once the reading has been announced, you will have a week to read the selected fan-fiction and provide your comments. These are the guidelines to structure your comments. 

Because this week is a trial run of the fan-fiction reading club, I picked the theme and the 2 pieces of fan-fiction we will read and discuss. In the future, we will have a poll to decide the theme and afterwards each person will have the opportunity to suggest one fan-fiction that suits the theme. 


This week we will read "Forgotten Friends" by Dejana Talis. Rated G. It is also available on fanfiction.net under the writer name "Dejana Talis".

Next week we will read another character study focusing on Mamoru.

I'm assuming we post our comments in this thread?

Well, this is definitely a different take on the usual wedding scene. You don't often read about Motoki's relationship with Mamoru and how it might of been strained. He doesn't get much character sometimes, but I could see him being the guy who puts on a smile for the sake of not dragging the party down. The last bit with Naru was unexpected, but there was a nice parallel between them. They were both the "normal" friends that Usagi and Mamoru had before everything changed. I personally don't see Usagi completely forgetting her existence, since I'm assuming they were friends for years prior, but it could be interpreted that way. I always thought we were seeing less of Naru and Motoki because there just wasn't time for them story wise.

I wanted to start by saying that I really like this idea! It's fun.

So, Forgotten Friends. 
I liked the idea for this story, and like JupiterThunderCrash said, it's not something you get to read about often, so it's a nice change. Motoki is one of my favourite secondary characters to use in stories, so it was nice to see him as the star of one. I wasn't expecting that ending, so I loved that it surprised me. It would be interesting to see a second chapter from Naru's perspective, and I think that it's really nice how they both kind of found someone else who totally understood what they were going through in the end.

I don't know how plausible I find the story to be. I do think that Motoki would put a smile on his face regardless of what he was truly feeling for the sake of his friend, but I don't think Mamoru would have really abandoned him like that. Motoki really is Mamoru's only long time male friend that we ever really see (unless you count the Shitennou, but they're not the same). 

I also feel that this story would have benefited from a little more description; the show instead of tell deal. I feel like the author got stuck describing Motoki as the blond one, and Mamoru has the dark-haired one, and since it's such a short story with few characters, I felt that that was a bit unnecessary.

And to reiterate JupiterThunderCrash again, I too don't think Usagi would forget about Naru like that. It kind of goes against Usagi's whole personality.

I do agree that it's an interesting look on Motoki. We don't know much about him other than the fact he seems to be the typical Nice Guy type, who's apparently perfectly happy running his family business, who is also more outgoing and friendly than Mamoru and has a girlfriend. That's pretty much the extent of Motoki's character biography. However some people have noted that during all the five arcs of Sailor Moon he has never been targeted once for energy, heart crystal, star seed, dream mirror, and neither was his game center a target for the Black Moon Clan (all of this in the anime) even though it's the senshi's center of command for years. In the manga he was targeted once by the ghost bride, but I think that's it? Some people found this weird and attributed it to the fact that he's just a really mediocre person with no ambitious goals and dreams who literally surfs along that in that middle ground, never sticking out as terribly bad or terribly good at anything.

I think this fic portrayed his close relationship with Mamoru quite well, but I find it strange that he would never even try and ask Mamoru outright what's going on if they're so close. Or even ask Usagi, because I feel like Motoki had a pretty close relationship with Usagi too since she hangs out in the game center all the time. I don't think asking her is crossing any line (just a general, what's up with everything/your boyfriend kind of question). This is why I liked that he found out about the senshi in the manga, mostly because I always feel bad that the civilian friends get shoved over simply because they don't know the senshi's secrets. I would like to think that's not how it worked with Naru, either. Which is why I found the ending a bit contrived (not only for the fact that they were both crying in the rain about it and saw each other - although I found that a bit too melodramatic for my liking).

I started to feel bit disconnected with the story when Usagi and Mamoru were portrayed as strangers to these friends who were once so dear to them. Motoki, I believe is Mamoru's first "adult" friend, and I believed Usagi and Naru grew up together. And Usagi's love doesn't function that way; if she found more people to love, she won't take away her love from someone else that came before.

I also did find the constant descriptions of their hair color distracting and wished the author had used other means of description or just used their names.

It's an interesting take on things, though, and I think this is what most people assumed happened to the civilians that disappeared from later arcs, but I think that's all for out-of-universe reasons (not enough room/time to keep telling their stories). In-universe, I like to believe they haven't been forgotten entirely.

Wow, this fic pulled me in.

I have three minor critiques and then I'll gush about the parts I liked:
1.) Using hair colors as descriptors. This is good in that it's easy to tell which character is currently being described, but the repetition bogs down the sentences a bit.
2.) The Reika section - The dialogue is somewhat clunky though I can see what the writer was going for here. The situation comes across realistically otherwise.
3.) Crying in the pouring rain - as Mercury stated, a bit melodramatic. Perhaps something more understated, like Motoki and Naru meeting in the courtyard of the reception hall and not weeping openly, would've had a similar effect.

Now for the GOOD!
I can completely see something like this happening to an extent with the human friends in the anime. The topic is one not usually explored and this captures it well. Of course everyone Mamoru and Usagi know would be invited to the wedding, but they truly haven't kept in good touch with the non-Senshi people in their lives. SuperS provided a nice pseudo-send off for the characters and Stars did a very good and subtle job at showing how each of the characters were growing up and exploring different interests. To me this is a nice continuation of that.

The fic also gave me all sorts of feelings! I really connected with the emotions running through Motoki's head and also could feel his understanding and mirroring of Naru. It's amazing how a few paragraphs can really enhance a character who is otherwise fairly flat and background, especially in the anime.

When I began to read this, I got the feeling that Motoki was very conflicted with his feelings regarding his best friend's marriage. This is understandable, I mean - your best friend has practically signed himself over to another person (I know this is not very accurate word-wise but it's 5:30 AM so bear with me). But anyway, I can see why Motoki would be a little upset. I love how, after the introduction is made, the author goes into further detail to explain why Motoki is feeling this way. Merely six paragraphs in and I'm already starting to feel very sympathetic towards Motoki, who is basically losing his best friend. I am also noting how the author chose to make Motoki seem like he had already given up all hope on chances of his friendship with Mamoru being brought back to its original state. This is something that I feel will foreshadow to a character development later in the story. Seven paragraphs in, and Motoki doesn't seem like the Motoki we all know and love. He seems lonely and sad, which is quite depressing for such a typically pleasant, polite character who made everyone smile.

Nine paragraphs in, and it seems like the author has written this paragraph to make it seem like the reason behind Mamoru and Motoki's distant friendship is Usagi's fault. Not on purpose, of course, but Usagi is still the reason behind it. Ten paragraphs in, and I'm starting to see something in Motoki that used to be present in myself. He is allowed his thoughts and his emotions of sadness and pain to build up inside him. Soon, he is going to crack and there will be some sort of emotional breakdown or fight. I am very intrigued by the literary devices used by the author of this fanfiction.

Right now, I am getting mixed signals from the author over how she wants Motoki to appear. Vulnerable? Selfish? Rude? Lonely? As I'm going through the middle of the story, I am beginning to see that there is a strange over-dramatized thing happening here. This is mostly the fault of the author, and I think really they were just trying to put more emotion and pathos into the story.

I do find it a little odd that Motoki gave drunk Reika the car keys. Either he is really out of it or the author is from a country or state that doesn't enforce drunk driving as heavily as they do in America (maybe the author is following Japanese law or something?).

Now I see that Motoki does not blame Usagi, and this story is starting to become more interesting. If there was something else, something that didn't have to do with Usagi or Mamoru's love life, I'm extremely curious to know what's going on. This was a fantastic job by the author. Right when the story was starting to get a bit slow and boring, she picked the perfect moment to catch the readers' attention once more. However, that over-dramatization that I mentioned previously makes a return again, and that excitement kind of fades. And then the author picks the excitement right back up again when Motoki bumps into Naru.

At that moment, it all clicked. I understood the author's reasoning behind writing the story, and the meaning behind it. In the anime, Motoki and Naru were practically wiped out of the storyline, seemingly forgotten by Usagi, Mamoru, and the others.

In conclusion, the character development in this story is not only applying to Motoki, but also to Naru. This development does not necessarily take place within the story, but the story itself is explaining the development that happened over time in canon. As Usagi and Mamoru took on multiple endeavors together, their closest friends had been forgotten and left behind, and this fanfiction is the result.

Beautiful choice, V I really enjoy reading this, and I loved analyzing it in this way!

I never noticed the abundant descriptions of hair color and style before, and I've read this particular fan-fiction so many times. You know what, though? I fall into the same pattern often. Sometimes, I struggle for ways to name a character other than by his or her proper name or hair color. I want to avoid starting every sentence with "Motoki this..." and "Motoki that...", so I try to change it up... but then I can't figure out what to change it to, lol.

But, I love Dejana Talis' works, especially her Sailor Moon fanfiction. If you haven't read anything by her, I would highly recommend finding her on fanfiction.net.

I need to get around to reading this. But I love your analysis, Moon Rose!

Miss Moon, I really liked your analysis as well. I also thought it was strange about giving Reika the car keys. I don't know much about drinking laws in most other countries, but in Japan it's ridiculously strict. Far more so than in Canada. Maybe they just thought it wasn't a big deal?

And Sailor Venus, I know what you mean. I also don't like always using the characters names. I feel like it gets weird when they're used too much. But I think there are other ways to describe people than their name or their hair colour, haha. For example, clothing, occupation, other physical aspects (height, eye colour, etc). 

I definitely will check out more bythis author, though.

He did say not to drink anymore, so I think he assumed she would wait until she was sober to drive, I guess.

Yeah, true. And Reika doesn't strike me as irresponsible.

Sorry for the delay! So, I know I said the second character study would be about Mamoru, but then I realized Dejana Talis wrote the second character study, too, and I want to change it up a little bit. I included the link, just in case you want to read it.

So, the second character study features Helios in the fan-fiction Beautiful Dreamer by Heavenly Pearl.

Bump! Anyone have a chance to read Beautiful Dreamer, yet?

On Monday we will do the last activity for the theme Character Study. But, no worries, you can discuss anything we have read during that last activity, if you want.

Oh darn, I actually read this way earlier and then got swamped with stuff so I forgot to comment. XD

Anyway, I think this one gives a clearer picture of what Helios was thinking during the SuperS arc, as the anime tended to make his motives very vague for the majority of the time. Here I can identify with his wanting to protect Chibiusa more. He won't tell her things because he doesn't want to increase the risk of her getting hurt because of his choices if someone dangerous figures out where Helios is hiding.

I rarely read any stories that have Pegasus / Helios / Chibi-Usa in them, so it was nice to read something that I'm not overly accustomed to.

I thought it was a sweet and innocent story, and that the author was able to really explain how Helios felt. You got the feeling that Helios really does care for Chibi-Usa.

... I feel bad not having too much to say about it, haha.

I am headed to a murder mystery party this evening, so I shall give comments/analysis tomorrow...

So, just in case I do not get to this tomorrow....

Feel free to comment on either of the character studies we have read thus far. In the mean time, I would like to offer you to apply what we have learned about character studies by writing your own. You are not obligated to post your character study here nor are you obligated to pick a character we read this week.

However, I encourage you to at least give it a shot. The point of this exercise will not be to discuss the content of what you wrote, but rather for you to discuss the experience. What did you like about writing a character study? Did you feel as if you are closer to the character because of what you wrote? What would you do differently next time you wrote a character study? Did you have any difficulty writing about your character? These are the types of questions I think we should discuss, because the answers to these questions would be more beneficial to us as writers and role-players.

The story was very sweet! It fit the tone of the SuperS season very well, with the innocence and child-like storytelling. 

I have very little to critique, as the story flowed very well and Pegasus was in character. If anything, it was so well entrenched in SuperS tone that it almost seemed redundant, as Pegasus' reluctance is abundantly clear once the viewer learns the truth. 

The best part is that the author has constructed the story in such a way that readers who know the story have nuggets in some of the suggestions but for those who don't, there aren't any spoilers as to the final reveal of Pegasus' true nature.

Bump! I am definitely writing my character study on Saturday. I'll let ya'll know how it went. (:

Did anyone try writing a character study? (: Tell us how it went. What did you like about writing a character study? Do you feel like you understand the character more? What would you do differently next time you write a character study? Did you struggle with anything?